Statement of Purpose
In the past I have stated that I hate writing reviews of other people's work. I felt, what right have I to pass judgment upon someone's hard work they'd sweated and toiled over for untold hours? What can I possibly add? What do I know? I do know that there is a lack of exposure for do-it-yourself comix artists who produce bodies of work that are either too small scale or too individual for acceptance by mainstream comic stores and distribution channels.
I want Assblaster to review only self-produced independent comix. I have a warm spot for my fellow xerox-based publishers but even glossy stuff is welcome if it's a not-for profit venture. I will write honest reviews of pictorial narratives (i.e. comix), with as little extraneous bull sh*t as possible. Space is limited. Assblaster will serve as a resource for creators and publishers to submit their work for a write-up so that others may find out about them, but I will not accept paid ads. It may taint my impartiality.
Assblaster will blast your rotten ass with it's no nonsense attitude while schooling you to all the hip independent comix out there for the discerning reader. Guard your rectal regions. Assblaster number one is not protected by a copyright so feel free to reprint and distribute this information at will. Send any and all correspondence to: Mike Tolento, P.O. Box 20028, Santa Barbara, CA 93120 or email: miketolento@hotmail.com.
For those who have read this far and still give a damn, I self-publish the xeroxed minicomic, EMPTY LIFE. Consider them comix for a fu*ked up world by a fu*ked up little wigger. I've done twelve issues so far and if not for my REAL sh*t job, there'd be more. You can have your very own copy by sending two bucks to the address above. Thrilling news, no?
Assblaster Reviews The Adventures of Doorknob Bob. $2.58 to Jason Shiga, 680 Santa Ray Ave., Oakland, CA 94610. jasonx@ocf.berkeley.edu. Most cartoonists learn their craft from studying the work of other cartoonists who've come before them. Art styles evolve through this process of cross-pollination. Jason Shiga is one of the exceptions to this rule. His art is more reminiscent of a kindergartner on Ritalin than it is to any other comics practitioners. His scratchy linework is fluid and remarkably expressive. What it lacks in technical precision (a lot), it gains in frantic energy. This is a sloppy scribbled mess of a comic, but I enjoyed every minute of the reading experience. Years of static electric shocks from touching doorknobs have rendered Bob a doorknob phobic. Imagine being unable to open doors out of blind fear. But when the virus, Fred, plagues mankind as it spreads from victim to victim via doorknob, Bob's curse becomes more of a blessing. This twisted, neurotic little comic is sure to bring a smile to your face. Steer clear of this one if you're a stickler for straight panel margins or if you don't like people who are occasionally drawn like jellyfish. But if you like fun comix, go for Shigatoons! Oh, and Jason, put your damn address in the comic, man. All ages. 24 pgs. 8.5 x 11". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Churn #4. $2 (?) to Bruno D. Nadalin, P.O. Box 142, Hoboken, NJ 07030. As expected, the new issue of Churn is a glorious parade of the grotesque. Bruno's artwork ranges from cute and cartoony with uniform line widths to ultra-realistic (oozing sores and all) with precise crosshatching. Stylistic comparions to Basil Wolverton are hard to avoid. Bruno displays his sharp sense of over-the-top humor through a variety of single panel to multi-page gags centering predominantly around good old cock n' pussy jokes. However, as a change of pace, in this issue we're also treated to an autobiographical account of the pre-pubescent Bruno's fanatical love (which is borderline homoerotic) for Jim Morrison, a revealing exposé on old drawings by his father which proves the apple does not fall far from the tree, and even some political stuff mocking the garbage propaganda broadcasted on talk radio. A fun read for the not so easily offended. Adults only. 24 pgs. 8.5 x 11". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Get Bent #5. $2 to Ben T. Steckler, 957 Richwell Dr., York, PA 17404. I have been enjoying BenZines ever since I first met the one and only Ben T. Steckler at the 1997 Small Press Expo. The bulk of this, the final issue of Get Bent, is part two of "The Last Sid Ska Story." Don't let all the backstory you may have missed keep you away from this comic. It's stand-alone enjoyable. Ben has a sharp sense of humor and a real gift for dialogue and dialect. Watch as our heroes Sid Ska and Dex narrowly escape certain doom in a Japanese prison camp with a little help from Sid's mom, the giant robot pilot. As a bonus, flip this issue for a sneak preview of Ben's new upcoming series: a tongue-in-cheek, yet honestly heartfelt tale of a man making peace with his life, his career and his chin called Unshaven Chi #0. Your sides will be aching but your eyes will be happy as Ben's artwork looks crisper and cleaner than ever before. I guarantee you will not be disappointed. Get Bent is a real gas! 32 pgs. 5.375 x 8.25". Printed by "Small Publishers Co-Op". 2 color cover, b/w interior.
Gray Noise #2. $2 to Nathan Thrailkill, 554 South 34 St. #2, Omaha, NE 68105. nada@inebraska.com. Nathan's new comic is something of a riddle, wrapped in an enigma, shrouded in mystery. This book is more a display of Nathan's bold, angular, heavily design-conscious artwork than a sustained narrative. And yet a story is being woven here, however surreal. The events flow at a dream-like pace toward an uncertain ending, while maintaining a restrained grace that evolves into controlled fury, all expressed through line art and minimal dialogue. Stylistically similar to Egyptian pictographs, this book will have you simultaneously scratching your head while marveling at Nathan's singular comic sensibilities. It is difficult to do such a unique work justice through my dry reviews. If you have any desire to explore the cutting edge of new avant-garde cartooning, here is a place to start. All ages. 36 pgs. 7 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Martin The Satanic Racoon #1. $1 to Gabe Martinez, 1212 N. Cole Ave #4, Hollywood, CA 90038. gabemart@hotmail.com. Martin The Satanic Racoon is a role model for our times. Look to him for guidance. Learn ye the truth about the Bible, animal rights activists, space aliens, and Andrew Cunanan in this illustrated gore-fest. Nothing is sacred or taboo. This comic succeeds in it's delivery of shock-value gross-out humor where others fail simply because Gabe is a real talent. When he draws babies being splattered on pavement or college kids eating corpse guts, he does it with such loving attention to detail that one can't help but cringe. Torture, death and mutilation are never funny but hyperbole is. This, my friends, is comedy. Mature readers. 16 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Noe-Fie #8. $3 to K. Wolfgang, 14 Allen Place, Collinsville, CT 06022. NOEFIEPUB@aol.com. The latest issue of Noe-Fie is a full length self-contained wordless rollercoaster ride. K. Wolfgang has mastered the silent comic story with this milestone issue of his minicomic. He expertly exploits his cartoony characters facial expressions and bodily gestures for full emotional impact. The story follows a day in the life of a young boy whose parents kick him out of the house, has no friends, buys ice cream only to have it stolen by a dog, has a bum puke on him, etc., etc. As a departure from the usual rampant anger and hopelessness in previous issues of Noe-Fie, this issue ends on a happy note for our hero with the help of a little magic. Wolfgang's art combines highly stylized and detailed linework with a sharp eye for page design. This is a fast "read" because your eye races to keep up with the frantic pace of the narrative, yet it leaves you fulfilled and just a little bit in awe of Wolfgang's accomplishment. This is comic art at it's purest and most universal form. Don't miss this. All ages. 36 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. Color covers, b/w interior.
Numb Skull #3. $2.50 to Jaime Crespo, P.O. Box 112, San Anselmo, CA 94979. nitepress@aol.com. This is a collection of short one to four page humor strips. Granted they're simple concepts but it's all masterfully executed. Jaime is a solid craftsman with a clean artstyle. This is a perfect comic to give to a sick friend who needs cheering up. You'll meet an unnamed guy with a lemon-shaped head who lives for cable tee-vee, a pair of "cyclops pickles from outer space", and an assortment of "cute little talking animals". There's some hilarious social commentary on everything from white supremacists to Jerry Springer in a piece called "Things That Make Me Wonder". My favorite part of this issue is Jaime's text-only story where he tells of how he and his bad-ass wife put a pack of rude movie theater patrons in their place. Mature readers. 24 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Ped Xing #9. $1 to Androo Robinson, 2000 NE 42nd Ave. Suite 302, Portland, OR 97213-1305. I am constantly bedazzled by the sense of wonder Andoo instills in his stories. His latest is a silent comic where he deftly conveys emotion totally through his characters' movements and actions. The story, "A Bridge Over Nothing" follows a mysterious walking man clad only in a wooden mask and loin cloth. He scales mountains, climbs trees and leaps over canyons until he reaches a massive gulf which he cannot cross. My only criticism is that the ending felt a little abrupt. Perhaps this piece could serve as a prelude to a longer tale. Or maybe it is meant to end at an impasse, like life. Either way, I enjoyed the visit and am left yearning to return. All ages. 20 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Savage Daisies Book 2. $2 to Jesse Hamm. 2401 West Turner Rd. # 205/401, Lodi, CA 95242. Jesse is a master storyteller. He creates realistic characters, puts them in believable situations centering around mature issues we can all relate to. The three short pieces in this book illustrate how a lack of communication affects interpersonal relationships. First there is "The Giantess", Jesse's autobiographical story of a high school crush. Young Jesse loves Stephane (whom he draws as an unattainable giantess) from afar, his fear keeping him from voicing his admiration. Not until they actually talk does Jesse realize her true beauty lies not in her stature but in her humanity. The second story "Liasons" Depicts why we comic book artists often fail to get along at conventions: poor communication. And finally, a deceptively simple one-page wordless stick figure strip called "The Couple" graces the back cover. The couple seems happily in love outwardly but are really miserable thanks to (that's right!) their lack of communication. In the first five panels, they're drawn speaking about apples in total agreement through out the day until, in the final panel, they go to bed and separately dream longingly about pineapples. Jesse combines exceptional technique and mastery of the form with a clear, single-minded sense of direction. Bravo. A must read. All ages. 16 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Ten Foot Rule #4. $1 to Shawn Granton, 170 Beaver St., Ansonia, CT 06401. Ten Foot Rule has always been an exciting hodgepodge of cartoonist, Shawn Granton's ideas. He is a skilled craftsman who can crosshatch with the best of 'em. His stories run the gamut from biting satire to biting self-deprecation. In this issue, watch as "Uncle Frank's Clubhouse" takes the classic old Soupy Sales routine a step too far. Instead of telling kids to steal mom and dad's money, Uncle Frank gets 'em to steal mom and dad's handgun. "Brain-Eater in the City" is a weird tale of a monster who lives in the sewers, sucks out people's brains and, horror of horrors, publishes a zine! But I think Shawn's strongest piece, "Contempt for the Working Class", succeeds by illustrating the degenerate workers, polluting practices, and lousy conditions at the factory where Shawn worked. It's frightening when you realize that factories like these are everywhere and make up the backbone of our industrialized society. Strong submissions from minicomix greats, K.Wolfgang, Carrie McNinch, Tony Consiglio, and Androo Robinson make this already enjoyable comic an indispensable comic. Mature readers. 20 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
Uncertain Stories #5. $1.50 to Jed Dougherty, 1917 San Pascual, Santa Barbara, CA 93101. I can't remember the last time I felt that old sense of genuine, wide-eyed, awe while reading a superhero comic. I guess I'm just not a "true believer" anymore. I'm thrilled to admit Jed's new comic is bringing it all back for me. Super City is the setting for (and title of) the most believable tale of super heroics I've seen in quite a while. In Super City, virtually everyone wears a cool costume and gets "treatments" for super powers, but - here's the catch - most in this super-population live real lives and maintain their day jobs. Few actually fight crime. The story follows one of Jed's recurring characters, a powerfully built babe named Rava, as she moves to Super City, finds a clerical job with the super group Echelon-X, and enrolls in Super-Tech University in hopes of becoming a certified crime fighter. If you're looking for a realistic depiction of Kirby-esque superheroism in the nineties, then look no further. I imagine this is what it would be like to actually live in the Marvel Universe. Watch for the down-on-his-luck crimefighter in a tiger suit begging for change, and Wobbly, who is currently in-between super speed treatments, making him a shaky mess. It's these little touches that make this comic brilliant. Mature readers. 32 pgs. 5.5 x 8.5". Xeroxed. All b/w.
INFO FOR PUBLISHERS -- Send your creations for review to Mike Tolento, P.O. Box 20028, Santa Barbara, CA 93120. Be sure to give me the price you're requesting for your publication and a return address where people can write to obtain it if you haven't clearly done so in the publication itself. I will try to review every comic I receive. If finances allow, I will give complimentary copies of Assblaster to everyone mentioned. Thanks. Y'all make it possible.
INFO FOR EVERYBODY ELSE -- Please write to the individual publishers to obtain anything you read about in Assblaster. Write them a nice long letter and mention Assblaster when you do. Remember, these folks make their comix AND maintain real lives and day jobs. Nobody's getting rich so be patient if they take a while to reply.
Mike Tolento
Empty Life
PO Box 20028
Santa Barbara, CA 93120
miketolento@hotmail.com
Subject: Assblaster Reviews